Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
You realize we can hear you jacking off in your room, right?
I like it rough
Birthday Coupon: This text is good for alteast 3 hours of Birthday Sex. Redeamable any time, anywhere, and any style.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
You crawled everywhere and rolled in ice cream. No more vodka for a month.
No, I don't think your idea of offering shots in exchange for bonus points to your history professor at B-Dubs was a good idea. Especially after you later told him that you would "tap that" in regards to his wife.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
"Accidentally" bump into him after class.
I'm gonna "accidentally" put his dick in my mouth.
If you're going to be single forever, you should try the quesalupas at Taco Bell.
Verdict: uncircumcised.
Randomize
