Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
My dignity? Collapsing on itself like a dying star.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
I'm starting to think The only feelings I have anymore are drunk and hung over
you can't hurt those
My passouts and memory loss are great training for when I have alzheimers. You'll know where to look when I get lost.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
She was wearing my robin hood hat from Halloween shouting "steal from the rich and give to the poor, mothafuckaaaaas." We are taking her everywhere.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
I'm so hungover it hurts to blink.. oh sweet merciful Christ what have I done
A big thanks to that bride-to-be, Her fiance and his loaded friends will forever hold a place in my heart for the generous tequila body shots on the couch at Henry's.
Some guy Just sang about my ass on the street
It was terrible lyrics but I would have thrown my life savings into that guitar case if I had any.
If it snows I'm making an igloo and getting wasted in it
Randomize
