did you know delaware is a STATE? HOLY CRAP! i didn't till i was hitting on this chick and asked her when she said she was from delaware, which state that was in. crazyness
Just saw a teacher from our school with his wife... Now i really know how little teachers get paid.
please stop referring to my baby as "your little fucker"
Your clothes are in washers 2,3 and 4. I arranged by darks, whites, then frat... I'm not even joking
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
youre always welcome to strip dance on tables with me Mag. what are friends for.
We should discuss this later when sobriety has returned. Right now he's just like a distant cousin.
This is Jewish guilt versus Irish Catholic guilt. We should tread carefully, or we could fuck up the space-time continuum or something.
I'm okay with that.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
Body paints and jello. Your canvas awaits
Another sexterpiece awaits
Lets just say my thoughts when getting dressed this morning was "vagina friendly" options
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
i havent showered for 4 days and i just made my dog smell my arm pit. also, im stoned.
Randomize
