The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
Three questions. How does a tomato drive a car, how does an asparagus play a guitar, and how am I still so high that I chose to watch Veggie Tales?
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Two man bar crawl was hectic. Just found leaves in my pocket.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
When the cops knocked on the door, he just knocked back and announced "house keeping"
You tried to get me to kick my booty call out at 3am by tempting me with a trip to ihop
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
No im the worst roommate ever. Just dump a bucket of water on my head at 8am so i can suffer like i deserve to.
Also I just took a shit at a bar so always remember that ANYTHING is possible.
Plan B, arranged marriage to a rich Indian, is rapidly becoming Plan A. Fuck Finals.
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
I CAN SEE SO MANY PENISES. There are so many visible penises here.
Where are you???
Yoga class :(
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
Randomize
