Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
The only ground rules are no one is allowed to come who will say "no, that's a bad idea" or "what if we get arrested?"
Yes, she gives me platonic blowjobs as part of our friendship.
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
Putting all my energy Into finding a polite way to ask my mailman to fuck me in his car.
He was wearing a tux and a big sombrero so it automatically made the flute he was playing totally cool
I have a taco in my pocket for later because I am a practical drunk
Why did you not tell me that video snapchats are a thing? This is a fucking game changer for my mobile sex life.
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
My boobs keep hanging out of this shirt. I think thats the style I'm going for tonight
Updates: Made out with a teletubby last night in the middle of the street #lifegoals
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