i just looked up and i was like omg ballsack and then i didnt know what to do
look mate, i'm pretty sure 14 texts saying "fuck me. fuck me now" more than passes the legal benchmark for consent.
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
The only way i can get arrested is public drunkenness or defacing a national monument. Trust me, i have already looked it up.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
Took three klonopin and turned all my jeans into jorts. I miss you
jesus, I think that canada gold metal game has completely changed all rules of acceptable drinking habits, I was fucked untill noon and I just got invited to go party when I get off work...at 600am...and NO ONE understood why i was hesitant
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
I just ate a handful of salt
I thought this was a good idea
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
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