I can hear the grilled cheese talking to me. "Let me in there!" they wanna get inside me
even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
My mom wanted me and my brother to have some bonding time before I left for school. Our bonding time consisted of us smokin a few bowls then goin to Red Robin to cure the munchies. Ooo how I love family time :)
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
for future reference: anal bleach BEFORE boozing
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
You haven't had the true md experience until you've had your crotch grabbed by a drunk stripper with a snaggle tooth in front of your coworkers.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Haha, maybe if he wasn't dressed up like Kimmy Gibler he could give her the D
I was chasing moonshine with vodka last night. I'm still not sure how I'm sober right now.
Thanks for letting me pee on your bed and cry about nothing to you. You're a real friend
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
My crotch smells like fire and I can't find my pants
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