Holy wow, I found all the old poems u wrote me back when we were in looooooooove...just sort of wild to look back on, thought u'd like that
haha it's okay then, bc he only killed a canadian, they're not real people
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
Literally passed out while tubing... Boating while hammered is a blast but thank God for life jackets
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
I pulled my bra out of my dress and handed it to my mom..at cocktail hour during the wedding.
But the guy you're fucking should not be within ten pounds of your weight when you're five fucking feet tall and he's 6'2". That's all I'm saying.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
He went down on me for like 30 min and honestly half the time I thought about those videos where people can smash watermelons with their legs and I just wanted to do that to his skull
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
Randomize
