You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
All I've accomplished this quarter is making Uno an acceptable drinking game.
you had sex with a 30 year old who doesn't have a cell phone but does have an 8 year old son.
he's 29.
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
I just got into the cab. It smells like weed and the driver looks like someone who may or may not be really talented at playing the saxophone. He also asked me my thoughts on porn when I told him I'm an actor. I might not make it home.
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
How about we just fuck in random places all around campus, and skip the boring relationship part?
Though I do have to question why i found you and my brother passed out on his bedroom floor, no clothing between you except his tie wrapped around your dick
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
You are attracted to power and since you can't date the married old guy you have to go for the next best thing - his gay son
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
Randomize
