sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
I'm on a cruise to the Bahamas and this text message is gunna cost me $10 but I need you to pray on my behalf for the things I'm about to do these 2 girls and what I did last night to a 35 year old mother of 3.
The two guys from next door helped him do a backflip. The ended up throwing him halfway through a ceiling tile. Don't worry, we fixed it with duct tape.
He sent me a Microsoft outlook meeting request to blow him in the storage room at work. I had to accept.
my boss just offered me his leftover salvia im not sure if it was a trick question
I was trying to be quiet until started to feel like my cock was being dipped in a rainbow and then I stopped caring temporarily
If thou doesn't answer thou phone thou shall receive a barrage of Dick pics. It's the eleventh commandment.
You threw up on his face 22 hours ago and now he's here holding your hand. I think he likes you.
I smoked my last bong as the sun rose. It was magical.
Well I've consulted some psychics but they keep saying all they hear in my head is screaming and all they see in my future is pool noodles and cheese dip?
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
You wanna explain to me why there is a banana shoved down my pants?
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
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