We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
Yeah. My legs are trembling...hard to walk. Feels like a neon arrow is pointing at me saying "just had sex (with not his wife)"
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
Hemmingway ran to paris to avoid going to the university of illinois and becoming a doctor. It was there he developed a drinking problem. I need a plane ticket.
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.
I took "we live within stumbling distance of the bar" as an invitation and challenge
I vaguely recall putting a toaster in the freezer.
you texted him "it's time for the no pants dance", please get your tubes tied.
I just dumped the bloody coke bill into the tip jar while getting my hangover coffee. I'm literally going to hell.
You just get me
I'm the wind beneath your wings, bitch
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