I wanna bring you to show and tell
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
Can you deep fry cheerios do you know? crucial question
She's pissed. She declared she was moving out and proceeded to pack 3 pairs of shoes, her electric wine opener and ONE sock. Then told us to have fun paying her portion of the rent.
Talk me down man. Writing a paper drunk and about to buy Celine Dion's greatest hits.
Crumbling up chips, putting them in salsa, eating with spoon. New level of stoner fatassery. Its so genius/delicous i'm not even ashamed
This is most sickening thing I've ever seen, and I threw up my body weight in jello shots on my birthday.
"The cab driver felt bad for us so he stopped to buy us chocolates. That counts as a valentine!"
Sorry it's taking so long, it's harder to take an ass pic with an iPad than you think
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
i guess "never drinking again" is not an option when you invent a whole new level of drunk...
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
