your thong is hanging out like whoa
420 ftw
I think id rather eat ped egg shavings.
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
he just flicked a booger into my mouth and shouted "goaaaal!"
my roommate just said, "don't look at it, just put it iin your mouth"
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
I feel like a food baby is going to burst from my stomach and eat all the leftovers until another food baby rips out of its stomach. And so on. It's truly a merry Christmas.
She was covered in mud grabbed my crotch and said see that handprint that means I called dibs
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
after stripping the bed and soaking it with the "pet spot remover" I have, I decided in the best interest of my mattress and our drunk friends bladders, i should invest in rubber sheets.
This hangover is too legit right now. I just sneezed and almost puked
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
Randomize
