do all gilrs hav hair on thier vagaina ?
Don't drive home.
i have your red jacket for some reason. and a good deal of shame and embarasment. note to self, wear underwear when you wear a dress. also, i was electrocuted last night. dont ask how.
i either bought an eighteen year old girl or i'm engaged to her... i'm not quite sure
my feelings for you are synonymous with those of a grizzly bear and salmon. i don't want to nom on you; but i need you to survive
I woke up with $100 in my pocket and I was so excited until I found an atm receipt for a $500 withdrawal. Not as exciting.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
Finished the final in under ten minutes and then puked in the bushes outside. I don't even care if I graduate anymore.
But don't worry I didn't actually get stitches, although according to the health center I probably should have
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
I am disappointed by everyone's lack of ability to dance on a stripper pole:(
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
I agree with that homeless guy though, you do need a haircut
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
She walked into the kitchen, said 'we've come to this time of the party,' reached into the bowl of cold spaghetti and shoved a handful in her mouth.
Randomize
