I skipped class, don't know why though bc all I did in the meantime was cook pancakes and watch infomercials..my life sucks
And then like 10 minutes later they were taking a bath together. HOW DOES HE DO IT.
there's just a random girl here singing about how much she loves fiber
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Last time I get high to write a paper the night before it's due. "Tiny Wings and sexuality" is not an acceptable topic to for a paper. Class in 30 minutes. I'm fucked...
i think they forgot i was still in the room... she grabbed his balls and said "i feel a fire coming on".
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
I just remembered that i did pull ups in a bikini on the porch of Red Lobster last night. someone needs to stage an intervention
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
I only wore my thong with cheeseburgers on it because I thought we'd have sex. So I basically wasted my best thong for nothing.
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I am eating croutons on my bathroom floor. Are you happy?!
woke up with 4 bruises, 2 hickies and a bad case of rug burn. texans are dangerous.
I’m calling dibs!
You can’t call dibs on dick. That’s free range dick. May the best vagina win!
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
