she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
You brought out the iron board layed it on the ground in the middle of everyone and passed out for the night
If I buy you $300 worth of popeyes, will that make up for me trashing the house?
The arresting officer told me "you probably get this a lot, but you look like anthony kiedis".
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
There was a gay guy in drag passed out against the wall but we had sex in there anyway.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
Remember that time you puked in a beer pong cup while someone else was playing?
that happened
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
Well in other news, my nipples are healing pretty well but next time I get drunk and decide to pierce something please for the love of god stop me!
i woke up on the floor in front of the fireplace and my last google search was "fuck sponges"
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
