and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
we hate each other therefore the sex is mindblowing
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
OPIZZABONMYDICK
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
i may or may not be making depth charges with cough syrup. i'll call you if i survive.
We went the strip club and out of no where the waitress brings him over a quesadilla and a jäger bomb and says your usual!! He swore he had never been there before
I made a nest in his bed. I'm not leaving
I'm too high and old for this...
You are cut off. Your giant penis and crazy awesome sex is ruining my body...
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