Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I hope im prettier
yea, just so you know this whole self-loathing thing is getting pretty fucking annoying
The Masters... another excuse to excessivly start drinking by 1
I just took went to the bathroom and it smelt like blue curococo... I didn't flush yet so head on up if you wanna know what a good night smells like.
Just found a peacock feather in my car. Should I be the least bit concerned about this?
Please don't let me drink ever again. I apparently told him he could stay but as there was no room in the bed he'd have to lie on top of me and he'd need to anchor himself on with his penis so he didn't fall off.
Haha, you avoided her at all costs. And then she shoved her tits in your face
I found a pair a guys underwear in my purse that has a British flag on it and says and I quote "British beef" what.the.fuck.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
He got me off while watching hockey. He's a keeper.
Whatever he got a sick blow job and his high school fantasy was fulfilled
And that's what dreams are made of
*hilary duff crying in the background*
remember when we said that thing when we met about how we were each glad we weren’t furries
ok listen,
You know shits really hit the fan when you start using public bathroom air freshener spray as perfume
what? where are you?
just took a pregnancy test before I went out drinking. if that's not drinking responsibly Idk what is.
Randomize
