Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
Now we are really drunk and her 17 yr old cousin is shitfaced. He may or may not have proposed a toast to octopuses and double fisting. And we just drank to Mexico.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
i can now proudly say that ive peed off of a balcony overlooking the pacific ocean AND a balcony overlooking the atlantic ocean
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
Jesus, you make out with one twin then sleep with the other and suddenly they don't want to play soccer with you... Men can be so sensitive...
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Just convinced a housekeeper at work to set up her 401k. Gotta start hittin the gb every morning before work. Happy 420
He told me I remind him of his ex girlfriend but in a better more advanced way..
whered you go
woke up in a ditch, shat infront of a little league game, slept in her stairway...i need to come here more often
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
She's wear your skin crazy! Is it wrong that I'm gonna fuck her 1 more time though?
Randomize
