i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
My landlord wasn't pleased about the new fire pit we built him.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
Lets be real here, you loved it when I was on top. With and without the machete.
Lets just make a point system, like if we have sex add a point, if they leave after take away a point, if they stay all fucking day take away a point
I rang in the new year by giving a lap dance to a Lutheran minister in a roomful of people including his wife. Jesus would be proud.
Omg. We have to workout today. I just looked at myself in the mirror and thanked a god I don't believe in for drunken boys and dark rooms.
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
