Remember when you weren't going to be a shit show?
ok so the lil girl sitting behind u was picking the hairs off ur sisters back and putting them in her mouth
dude i just saw a topless girl trying to get into her locked car. im moving here
Her bacne/racne was so bad it was like having sex with bubble wrap.
i'll never see her again. i cant remember her last name. this is like cinderella except prince charming drank too much jameson and couldnt save a phone number properly
Stop banging my friends. This is getting weird.
Stop being friends with hot 18 year old girls.
On the bad side I puked, but on the bright side I puked lettuce which was a new experiance
You screamed "show me a dick stand!" But before I could ask you wft that was you had passed out in the corner
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I made him dress me after we fucked. He put me in TMNT pants and then told me I looked hot.
...is this motivational speaking, or sexting? It's getting hard to tell.
I am on my way right now and I SWEAR TO GOD IF YOU EAT MY BURRITO YOU WILL NEVER SEE MY TITS AGAIN
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
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