imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
I am laying on the kitchen floor eating cold chicken fingers and drinking wine. welcome to my new years party.
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
You stressed the importance of not breaking the seal too early... and then proceeded to piss your pants when you sneezed.
But besides the pee thing, he sounds like a nice guy.
Also, the zoloft kicked in and I can't get an erection anymore. So I'm depressed.
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
When I eventually hook up with a resident lets refer to it as taking a hands on approach to my job
I fell into his fridge. I want to leave.
We compared her boobs to bacon. I'm probably going to have to justify that.
I don't know man, I woke up and shes here acting like she knows me, wearing my clothes, and scrambling eggs in my kitchen. I don't know her.
You were drinking with me last night, I warned you.
Is it bad that I'm using the photo I took for my fake ID as my linkedin profile pic?
I wish I were single again so I could actually have sex.
I fell asleep completely naked, standing up with my arms and head in the freezer
i think she learned that just cuz half shots were easier, doesnt mean she can have triple as many.
Randomize
