what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i have a bunch of little boys around me trying to hit on me
dont be selfish, show some boob
Somehow last night, my dad got me so drunk that I ended up throwing up on the couch, turning the cushions over to hide it, and going to sleep on them.
so we have officially lost him as of 7 hours ago.. already called campus security, the drunk tank and the hospital. figure he'll turn up eventually..
i'll start checking the bushes on campus.
She's the barista slut.
I thought I could grab a hold of my stream of urine. So she left pretty soon after that.
Soooo fucked this chick last night! While fucking she started talking into the fan on the side of my bed. Does that count as sex with a robot
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
Dicks are not precious.
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
It was all like "my feathers evolved from scales of a reptile bitches!!" and I was all like "damn this chocolate milk is AWW SOOME!"
Randomize
