I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Also, I once came to the conclusion after this one boy, that her pleasure condoms are a college boys version of flowers
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Haha that's why you never name the penis. Its like a pet, once named you will most likely get attached.
thanks for the bloody nose. you probably dont remember, i'm not mad.. only because your boobs are to blame
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I just watched our fat male neighbor dibble a soccer ball across the lawn. It looked like Baywatch with diabetes
I just picked up my phone and one shoe from the man mowing the lawn next to the ice rink. He found them in a tree.
I think I need to see a chiropractor after giving that blow job
I need dunkaroos back in my life.
He said he wanted to lick the breadcrumbs off my chest
Oh and it’s been a year according to my snap chat memories since I banged your cousin in your sons truck pulled over on Elm St! 😂😂😂😬😳😇
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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