Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
I just added her as a friend on Facebook. I met her 5 minutes ago and there are already more than 50 pics of me uploaded... from other nights.
she "accidentally" hit me with her car, its almost as if she know im fucking her boyfriend.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
just found a carrot inside of a baby sock. living with toddlers is like living with tiny hammered people.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
If I could drive and get you Starbucks I would... But that's probably not a good idea. On account of the drugs.
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I can't believe i just offerred a guy a burrito and head, and got turned down. Officially celibate now.
Sorry I've been a slutty nightmare this week
Do you have feelings for this penis?
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
The next morning I found her spread eagle asleep on the living room floor and he was asleep with his head in her crotch. I needed a ride and had to wake them up.
"I'm 22, I could die in a piano bar." -a sentence i actually just said to my boss
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