hooking up with chicks might be the way to go after all. walk of shame looks better in her clothes.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I'm so hungover i just sang the alphabet to see if "Z" comes after "W"
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
Congrats on having the best tasting nipple at the bar last night.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
He cheated on me in real life. I can cheat at words with friends.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
would you like to venture to the magical clitoris forest?
His crazy is a thing to be cherished
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize
