we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
And now we have yet another reason to never travel to Detroit
I am the drunkest girl in the tree.
right. well i dont plan on getting laid till i find a respectable girl that i can make unrespectable
her and i fucked to a michael jackson song and she had it memorized so she squealed every time he did
I was relieved after I found the unopened condom in my pocket. Then I found the open one in the other pocket..
remember, YOU ARE A WINNER
my dinner was a box of cheezits simultaneously mixed in with cocoa puffs and fried rice.
I feel like I just walked the hall of shame thru the marriott. Everyone stared.
I think it was the shoes and limping. Not the sex. I could b wrong.
He busted his lip while trying to keep from passing out in the pool. The hotel people don't seem to be too concerned that we're passing around a bottle of SoCo at 11 am.
I fucked a 6'7 Danish man. In the ocean. At 5am. Greetings from Florida!
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
I just spent my entire state tax return on sex toys
I'm hoping you were seen by someone holding a frozen turkey at 230 in the morning
ditto.
about cumming, not toast
Dude, A DAMN CHEESEBURGER HIT ME IN THE FACE!!! WTF was i suppoused to do!?.
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