You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
im so hungover...we just watched The Perfect Storm and i got seasick
Just talked to the girl you brought home from the bar last night while she was looking for her panties. She said to tell you "nice try".
Now that you're back together are you gonna tell him you set his stuff on fire?
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
I wasn't going to take him home until I heard "hung like a water buffalo" then curiosity got the best of me.
Taking a semester off always leads to bad things like having a baby or getting married
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
she's unstoppable after she starts doing shots and yelling NANNER
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
A guy in a gorilla mask got blown on the lawn. And then the night got weird.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
I was on tinder the whole time I was waiting for my pregnancy test results at the doctors.
He made me ask permission to to cum and it made me cum.
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