All time low... just gave a strip tease to the theme song from Law&Order SVU.
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
just brushed my teeth with a bottle of jack. ew. not all it's hyped up to be.
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
Outside the community dumpsters: beer bottles and a carton of orange juice. Looks like we were here.
I just saw a fat chick walking across campus talking to herself and licking her lips. Diet season is scary.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
She who has the vag holds all the power. He will learn one way or the other.
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Hot Damn Cinnamon Schnapps make me feel like the sun is punching me in the face and a bear is sleeping inside me.
We're keeping you on a leash this Saint Patrick's Day
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
Randomize