I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
just threw up into the cup of Gatorade I was hoping would settle my stomach. thanks again, alcohol.
A moment of silence for all our pussy whips bro's who had to endure the NEW MOON premier!
We tried to play doctor all sexually then he was taking down my 'symptoms' I said I needed to puke he thought it was part of the game
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Well that's the first time I've woken up with wet jorts
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I mean I sucked his dick at 3 AM... UNDERWATER. I think I have earned a follow back on twitter.
I just pictured my inhibition personified as little pink piggies with wings flying off into the great wide nowhere hahaha
Did you or did you not grab my boob while I was making out with the foreign kid?
I'm just going to ride dicks all the way to the to the gates of hell
I should not be able to sum up my life with a taco brand motto...
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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