I'm talking handstands, sex in broad daylight, waking me up in the middle of the night. CRAZY
handstands? WTF?
she was a gymnast
go to hell.
I just realized that this morning is the first morning i've put on underwear in a week.
I love summer.
i just shit 3 out of the 4 types of matter
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
come on down! you are the next contestant on the night is drunk!
She made me go down the fire escape when her mom came for breakfast.
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
Asking for a friend: is it frowned upon to eat pizza while you materbate or does it just mean you are fantastic at multitasking?
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
So how do I tell him I've been sleeping with his wife too?
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
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