So ignoring my calls doesnt work if you update your facebook a minute later.
she went to type in rate my professors and rate my pussy came up in my recent searches. needless to say, i will likely be masturbating to the aforementioned site tonight.
I just gift wrapped bread.
I just wnated to let you know that I laminated my history notes so i can study in the shower.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
and i fell asleep on top of a grilled cheese sandwich. not the best decision. but not the worst.
Hey, I took a sweater from your house. And, um, your little brother's virginity.
That BJ in the bathroom was definitely worth the $20 cover.
I ate pizza in bed, sans pants, and then carved a pumpkin. FUNCTIONING ADULT MOTHERFUCKERS!
You then played what you called "a smooth jazz rendition of talk dirty to me" all thrusting your crotch at the bartender. Mom looked horrified, but my dad couldn't stop laughing
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
That's not the problem. The problem is I thought I was over him but he smells nice today.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
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