I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
I found a wheel chair. there is now a high chance im going to be fired from this job
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
another part of my inner child died when i emptied my crayon bank for dollar beer night.
You know how I've been hooking up with my ex? Well he told me he loved me and I said I was just there for sex so let's get it done. He looked sad, but he did it anyways. And life was good again.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
I'll be thirty in eight months. I think my goal is too stop changing my pants in the parking lot at work by then.
If I get a 4.0 I am doing SO much cocaine.
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
I'm not sure when I will get off this toilet at work but it's not looking promising
EITHER I'M HIGH OR JUST REACHED A NEW LEVEL OF SINGLE FEMALE SADNESS BECAUSE THIS BROWNIE IS GIVING ME ORGASMS
There's a baby in the strip club. I say again: THERE'S A BABY IN THE STRIP CLUB
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
Randomize
