Afterall, it is the real San Francisco treat
I know i'm drunk when the "men" sign on the bathroom sounds chinese
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
and when he finished he started shouting "swim boys SWIM"
We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
Using a Nedi Pot after doing lines... at least I'm a health conscious drug user?
You just squeezed a person out of you and I'm drunks at 2PM. Our lives got traded and you know it and you're jealous.
There is naked swordfighting and something green and alcoholic going on in the basement. COME. OVER. NOW.
I did not get laid last night bc my condoms were too small. I'm allowed to be dreary
So Bodhi just sent me a pic of someone's balls with a message that says "I hope you all have a ballin' night." I don't even know what level of friendship to call this anymore.
Oh my god.
The ballsiest level.
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
On the plus side, I know I'm allergic to latex now. Like really fucking allergic
You took acid last night and I’m up early to go to the grand opening of a new TJMaxx by my house. We couldn’t be more perfect.
Randomize
