Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
Actions speak louder than pants.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
All I remember is mattress sliding down the stairs while giving him a blow-job. Sorry you had to witness the incident.
i put that paper plate back in your cabinet because i ate all the ketchup off and you can't even tell. you're welcome.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
We are all yelling at the cat at our apt in nothing but our underwear. How do you think it's going.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Does he know you were at a strip club taking shots of tequila right before you babysat his son?
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I need to stop adding people I want to bone on LinkedIn.
..... starting now
I just woke up with a cowboy hat on my face and a playboy from the 90s on my chest
Randomize
