He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
They seriously just ended our alcohol presentation by giving us beer cozies. I love college.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
My ex just sent me a message asking if she could blow me, but only if we get caught by her new bf. If she promises to swallow I'm doing it.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
When Pony by ginuwine plays I pretty much just grind on the nearest penis.
Wearing the same clothes for three days in a row and eating an entire two pound bag of jelly beans really has a way of making a person rethink their life...
Well, I'm hung over and my penis hurts - two signs of success
Is posting a pic on insta of my previously dyed blue pubes socially acceptable?
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
You hear the wildest shit in a Walmart bathroom.
I'm at home 4 xanax deep watching She's all that.. no I don't want to go out. The couch is eating me.
I know you would never do it--but if I ever walk into your house and find a "live love laugh" ANYTHING, I will commit you to an asylum. If it is a vinyl decal adhered to the wall, I will just smother you myself.
Randomize
