who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
I wish Pampers made couches for people like us.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
This is one of those situations that make me think to myself "what life decision did I make to get here"
i like being sick. whatever the doctor gave me is awesone. the walls are waving at me. i never want to get better.
I almost had to get my pinky cut off. Wow I'm so happy. We won beer olympics so i didnt hahaha
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
Katie told the cabby "when the boat docks I'm getting off with you"
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
I just call them the hipster frat because they wear shirts other than pastel polos and listen to MGMT while playing dice.
Girl behind me in line at cvs was getting impatient then outta nowhere blew up shouting that if she didn't get her plan b soon she might be a mom abd that if we couldn't tell she'd be a terrible mom
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
My dad lost his bandaid somewhere in the turkey. It was a mixture of thanksgiving and an Easter egg hunt
Randomize