he just texted me two pictures of his dick. i feel i should rethink whatever vibe im obviously giving out
so is it as big as he says?
he put a tube of toothpaste next to it as a reference. it looks legit
We got so high we made milksteak
He brought wine and beer. I'll put my pants on for wine and beer.
You are a booty call, not a friend.
And if I don't get arrested for drinking and canoeing over the next 3 days, this hurricane will not have turned out anywhere near as well as I planned
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
I threw up for like 20 hours. Im gonna be the DD for the next 5 years.
That's the last time I get in a car with six rappers headed to god knows where.
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
He's taking me to Tao. This is going to be so weird. How do you go on a first date with a guy that has seen you naked more times than clothed?
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
I'm now consulting a magic eight ball on all major life decisions. On another note I think I have chlamydia.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Never going back to jail again. Only time in my life I've ever had a wet dream about jerking it...
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