i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
operation "beaches make me wet" is a go
hey, can i borrow that thing you never use?
what?
your penis
The album was titled "Best Night Ever" until she found out she was preggers and switched it to "God Punishes Sluts"
It's like I'm in a vicious cycle of noncommittal penis.
Oh, and trying to figure out who wants to do Molly in a frat is like asking damn children if they want puppies and candy. So just bring as much as possible.
I beat my mom's friend's boyfriend in a vodka chugging competition. Our generation FTW.
Don't pretend you don't want to dance on the edge of overdose all three nights
Instead of more alcohol, I decided to drink tea. Lets slow clap it out for me
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
Just saw a man in a motorized chair roll by drinking a beer. It's 9:45 AM. I love Louisiana.
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
I've finally done it. I finally achieved my lifelong goal of becoming that awkward lesbian in high school who went on to have sex with more women than any of her male classmates.
grapes are the best munchies food ever cuz like the juice explodes in my mouth and my mouth gets all relieved of dryness. and the skin of the grape is like the food. and theres so many grapes!
Randomize
