Duck Duck Cougar?
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Never have I ever before welcomed her period with such enthusiasm. She was starting to pick out baby names. She got me "What to Expect When You're Expecting."
I know it may not be fiscally responsible to pregame fifty cent night, but I'm gonna go ahead and do it anyway.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
How do u explain cocaine to a 9 year old?
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
She needs sedatives and a leash
I found us a new booze connection and I'm writing college admissions essays. The future is bright.
All I know is I woke up with his business card in my bra and in my handwriting on the back it says 8 inch.
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
let me just take this time to thank you again for buying pudding.
Randomize
