That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
I've got 2 dollars. How do I turn this into alcohol?
Also, just had a student offer to sell me Xanax. Want some? Just for like a rainy day. Or our memorial day shitshow. Or just another Wednesday night.
He offered to teach me how hula hoop in exchange for acid. I took him up on it.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
I'm watching a man in drag spread food products on his face my life is spiraling out of control.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I would of joined had I not blacked out last night and ran around naked breaking things till 4 am
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
Ended up in his bed... He's passed out holding me and his bulldog is laying across my legs. Both snoring. HELP!! I wanna go home!
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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