So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
ARE YOU ALIVE? usually when i say lets start drinking at inappropriate times you come right over. im worried
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I was desperate so I downed my birth control with balsamic vinaigrette...
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
I can always tell its time to do laundry when my vibrator doesn't stay covered up in my sock drawer.
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
How would one go about tricking someone into chugging an entire bottle of tequila?
Just heard the girl at the bar cuss her bf out and order a long island ice tea. Going to give it 5 min then I'm going in. See you on the other side.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
I just had the best counseling appointment lets fucking rage
We both got free alcohol and got laid by foreign men last night.
I'm not going out again for the rest of my life. I can't top this.
Drugs are gluten free tho, right?
I should probably eat a Plan B. Pill for breakfast. Happy Halloween.
Randomize
