I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
I just had the ultimate walk of shame. I'm barefoot, in his gym short with vomit in my hair and I walked half a mile through campus. At noon. Thanks for picking up ur phone
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
He bought me a flower. He's totally getting head every day for a week.
do you think I can still get an erection if I donate blood today? this is important.
Miller High Life will be the death of me. Well, that and shower sex.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
You gotta pick a side. My suggestion: side with tits.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
My drug dealer bought me a book for Christmas. What a gentleman.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
How does fucking Canada get Justin Good Guy Take Me Now, Just Fuck Me In The House of Commons Trudeau, and our new President looks like he bathes in cheetoh dust and sin?
I may have interrupted sex but im bringing them both to McDonalds. Am I not the greatest older sister ever?
I'm pmsing pretty hard.. .just cried 3 times while eating a Hershey bar dipped in peanut butter
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