but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
Why were you high on a thursday?
today's a wednesday
I asked first.
He cooked the food on a paper plate in the oven.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
A freshman just woke up on our back pourch... He swears there was a party here last night but we didn't have one
Ran into my prostitute at Costco yesterday. She was with her boyfriend, I was with my kids. Awwwwkward.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
I'm about to play Thunderstruck by myself, that way I'll always get the long thunder part.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
Ugh I can't even look at alcohol this weekend, my body needs to heal.
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
After 2 minutes he came and said, "thanks for everything". I can't wait to hear what he says next time when I do more than just lay there.
Randomize
