We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
She went to college and exploded out of the slut closet.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Only you would think wine and coffee was an acceptable finals study time mix
We couldn't get our shit together to go to the bar, so we're getting drunk and facebook stalking all the girls who have gotten fat since high school. Any names you wanna throw out?
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
she sent me pictures of 3 different vaginas and if I could pick which one was hers i could sleep with her.
I was always good at matching as a child.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
I see your smile in the face of every drunk that senses he's about to slay a troll.
I was so high the sounds of a cricket drove me out of my home at 4am.... Boo that fucking cricket
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
I started crying during a meeting at work and now I'm sitting on my couch drinking boxed wine at 1:30 in the afternoon. Fuck you too estrogen.
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize
