Ok pretty sure I just saw Mike O'Malley walking through the parking lot. I wanted to see if I followed him, would he lead me to the acro-criag, i've always wanted a crack at that bitch.
You want looks pregnant, is pregnant, or the one with a kid.
While I'm in the bathroom taking a piss you think of a way to get us the hell out of here.
So I ate yogurt with the back of my toothbrush. I feel like I've officially been initiated into college.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
This exeeds the amount of high I planned on being.
After you verbally abused the McDonalds employee for not making your fries fast enough, the fact that you woke up on a random lawn does not surprise me.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
Carpeing THE FUCK out of that diem
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
Prob because you've thrown up alot. As long as its not like pure blood you're fine. Drink water.
Wesley I'm sober and my body hurts. There wasn't much trust in any of those falls.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
i peed in the parking lot at work not even thinking, a woman saw
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
Hey? Just a hypothetical. You ever accidentally kill somebody's cat on purpose? Like you didn't mean to but it had it coming? If you're wondering it tripped me while I was walking down the stairs and I landed on it as I fell.
Randomize
