thought so. i woke up and he was playing with my eyeliner. I MAKE GREAT CHOICES.
last night you decided it was time to "get organized" and "straighten out your life." You pulled out a bag of troll dolls, sorted through them and got nostalgic. You demanded both andy and i take one and keep it forever.
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
But sometimes ur dick treats me better than u do
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
I don't think casual Fridays means I can go to work with dried cum in my hair...
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
Like you know your sex life is in a downward spiral when your best friend offers to sext you from Ireland
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
Did I send you a naked snap the other day with a fat blunt in my mouth with the caption "$1200 bitches!" ?
In retrospect, vomiting out of a moving vehicle on the third date should have been a deal breaker
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
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