I discovered the grieving process is shock, denial, anger...and then something about drinking until you puke on yourself
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
i was driving around baked, windows down jamming to third eye blind and eating grapes for 35 minutes before i remembered why i left my house
I just heard "I just let you finger me on Megabus, I clearly don't have standards".
The floor and the wall just switched. I'm falling.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
True love: he brought me a margarita while was in the shower. He's a keeper.
I sent him a tit pic with the caption, "Mt. Arie and Mt. Hola are ready for expedition." Too nerdy?
This guy is like Don Jon! Im over here this weekend and at least four times I've heard porn on his phone thru the bathroom door.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
He ate me out in the warehouse on a pallet of sunlight soap. I fucking love night shift!
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