Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
Cool, see you soon... she just admitted to her friends that it was a queef.
I thought she was going to get passionate and throw her on the bed and fuck her, but she just started breaking stuff.
That's the thing about women.
pube in her braces AGAIN. barely kept a straight face.
Just walked by a group of guys calling out walks of shame with a mega phone from their front porch.
Just learned how to deliver a baby.the things i saw tonight can never be unseen
Dude, you need to come clean your dates vomit off the ceiling. What in the hell were you guys doing?!
Good news. Isn't krabs. Bad news. Not sure what it is. Worse news. Encouraged not to fuck till known. Great news getting laid tonight
I wish you could see how much hot sauce and broken glass are in our apartment right now.
I don't know where I am and I feel like a hippo shat in my mouth. This sofa is comfy though.
I made out with about ten people last night. And four of them were just on the way to my car from the bar. And one was my roommate.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Idk I just think that seeing that man's Twitter always resulting in me looking for the whiskey is a bad sign
Randomize
