yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
if women knew the size of my dick, theyd be much more receptive to my sloppy drunken advances
Just saw a cop give four blondes gas for their car on their way to Vegas. They seriously ran out of gas and called 911 about it. Its like a porno plot.
He came, while we were making out fully clothed. I'm going to write a book.
I expected to wake up with a sext of you posing nude and all I got was a missed call.....disappointed.
I'm sorry I think it was because I lost a chicken nugget in my purse and that's all that was on my mind until 4am
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
P.s. remind me to tell you about the porno that Paul envisioned starring you. It's wizard of oz themed.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
How do I cancel buying spotify premium for two homeless people?
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I woke up with gum stuck to my nipple piercings this morning.. So there's that.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
Have you heard yourself have sex?
I'm not THAT loud...
My neighbors filed a noise complaint.
Learned two new lessons today: 1) Do not identify pills found in one's car by taking them to see what happens, especially while at work, and 2) There is no logical reason to keep ambien in one's vehicle...
Randomize
